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Updated: Jan 20, 2021

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I can remember being in the 4th grade, afraid to ask the teacher questions out of fear of retribution from her or anyone in the class. The shame of being wrong or looking dumb overwhelmed me and shut me down.

Being raised in an environment that is nurturing, stable, where those who surround you "on the daily" consistently stop and listen to one another without penalty, supports the development of a self-empowered and self-actualized human. How did your family relate to you; Especially your parents, siblings, aunts, uncles, and cousins? What happened or is happening around you can not be healed until you heal what's in you.

Approaching one's life from the first-person narration has been frowned upon in some corners of society. You've heard the phrase, "They are so selfish," or the new word "Narcissist" all give the idea that placing oneself above all others is wrong.

If you put your needs first, you are not a Narcissist. A Narcissist means one has excessive admiration for themselves. Placing your priorities before GIFTING your energy to others' wants and needs is what I am speaking about here. Which is WAY DIFFERENT PEOPLE.

We ALL respond from first-person perspectives. It's our choice what we give our energy to, even when we put the Community's or Families needs first. The REAL issue is "WHY" we do what we do. What is your motivation?

Izzy said, "Family pays attention to what I do—wanting to make them proud because they gave you something."

Ask yourself the question: Why am I doing this? The honest response will inform your next steps.